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- ------------------------------------------------------------------
- SAN JOSE MERCURY NEWS
- Copyright 1994, San Jose Mercury News
-
- DATE: Sunday, March 20, 1994
- PAGE: 1A EDITION: Morning Final
- SECTION: Front LENGTH: 4 in. Short
- ILLUSTRATION: DRAWING: [Image on a computer screen shows a mother leading
- her children through dangerous territory.]
-
- WHERE ARE YOUR KIDS ON-LINE?
-
- MORE kids are traveling through cyberspace, a communications network that
- will one day influence almost every aspect of daily life.
- While the potential for educational opportunities is fantastic for
- children, many parents are not aware of possible dangers along the information
- superhighway.
- Are your children getting into ''chat rooms'' where adults can pursue them
- for sexual activity? Publicizing personal information like your address or
- vacation schedule? Running up huge bills?
- Family Reporter Lori Eickmann offers information to help parents understand
- this new frontier.
-
- SAN JOSE MERCURY NEWS
- Copyright 1994, San Jose Mercury News
-
- DATE: Sunday, March 20, 1994
- PAGE: 1H EDITION: Morning Final
- SECTION: Living LENGTH: 62 in. Long
- ILLUSTRATION: DRAWING: JIM HUMMEL - MERCURY NEWS
- SOURCE: By LORI EICKMANN, Mercury News Staff Writer
-
- VIRTUAL PARENTING
- ON-LINE SERVICES ARE OPENING UP A FASCINATING NEW
- WORLD FOR KIDS; BUT BEFORE THEY TRAVEL TOO FAR,
- PARENTS SHOULD MAKE SURE THEY'RE ON THE RIGHT
- TRACK
-
- MARY ELLEN Rose, a Kansas divorce attorney and mother of three, thought she
- and her family were computer-literate. Rose has used computers at work and at
- home for a decade, and her children, ages 12 to 17, are proficient at computer
- games and word processing.
- But early this year, within weeks of subscribing to a commercial on-line
- service, Rose, 46, discovered that her daughter Amanda, 12, had given her name
- and address to a 15-year-old New Hampshire boy she ''met'' in an on-line teen
- area - and the boy, aided by a 41-year-old family acquaintance, had written
- Amanda an explicit four-page letter detailing plans to visit her and have sex.
- Rose learned the man had contacted Amanda through electronic mail and told
- her he cared for her and wanted to help her and the boy get together.
- ''We have controls on our TV, and I don't let my kids go to R-rated
- movies,'' says an exasperated Rose. ''I just never thought of this. I feel so
- dumb.''
- The moral of the story is not that computers or cyburbs -- the virtual
- communities that have evolved on-line -- are inherently evil. But parents
- should understand that the on-line world is a vast and alluring one populated
- by millions of people with interests that range from honorable to unsavory,
- from educational to downright dangerous.
- And with more and more children skillfully but often innocently entering
- this world -- today linking up with computer-savvy pen pals worldwide and
- tomorrow tuning in to interactive TV - it becomes imperative for parents, many
- of whom are clueless about cyberspace, to become proactive in educating
- themselves and their children about life on-line and technological literacy.
- ''Being on an on-line service is just like being in a big city,'' says
- Rose, who urges parents to monitor their children's on-line travels. ''You
- wouldn't let your child wander around alone in a city; you shouldn't do it
- on-line.''
- Jeffrey Chester, executive director of Campaign for Kids' TV, a media
- watchdog group based in Washington, D.C., stresses that average citizens, not
- media conglomerates and advertisers, must help design the on-and off-ramps
- for the data superhighway. Otherwise, he warns,'' children will be the
- accident victims.''
- (box)
- The system will merge home technologies - including personal computers,
- telephones, televisions and VCRs - to create a communications network that
- will influence almost every aspect of daily life.
- Even now, a California teen can log onto ImagiNation Network, an on-line
- games and shopping service, and create a face - male, female, old, young,
- black or white - to represent himself on screen while engaging in interactive
- role-playing games or chatting with people around the country or the world.
- It's empowering, enlightening, entertaining and seductive for both adults and
- kids.
- On the television end, the oft-mentioned 500-channel interactive television
- will allow unprecedented access not only to programs but also to push-button
- shopping, interactive entertainment and other services.
- On the computer end, the superhighway is already in use. The Internet, a
- system of some 10,000 computer networks, is used by more than 20 million
- people. Parents with a home computer can pay bills, make airline reservations,
- find recipes or check consumer reports or sports scores. They can pose
- questions on electronic bulletin boards and wait for on-line answers to roll
- in.
- And while kids can access university or government libraries, they are more
- likely to be playing games or chatting.
- ''It's the mall of the future,'' says Audrey Mann, spokeswoman for
- ImagiNation. ''From a parent's standpoint, Jimmy could watch three hours of TV
- per night, or he could have an on-line pen pal he communicates with or plays
- games with.''
- There are thousands upon thousands of bulletin boards and chat rooms for
- users interested in everything from religion to sex.
- But Tony Wong, a Cupertino parent of a 5-year-old daughter and 20-year-old
- stepdaughter, says commercial on-line services need to go way beyond chats to
- attract the majority of families.
- Wong, 33, who works in eWorld, Apple Computer Inc.'s on-line services
- department, reluctantly admits there is little to justify on-line
- participation by most users.
- ''There is justification for 10 to 20 percent of the people who can afford
- it and who understand it,'' says Wong, who uses America Online for his stock
- portfolio and to look up baseball scores. ''For the other 80 percent, the
- truth is, it isn't there yet - but I think it will be soon.''
- Responding to a reporter's on-line request for parents' and kids'
- experiences on-line, Wong writes that the commercial services need to offer
- more educational and parenting content. He also says women and minorities find
- little aimed at them in the white-male-dominated world of cyberspace.
- For example, ''you don't see a Las Madres group on-line,'' he notes.
- ''These are local groups of maybe 15 to 20 people with kids born in the
- same year who talk among themselves about child-rearing issues. That would be
- a great service.''
- Children and teens confirm they go on-line mostly to socialize. Gianna
- Cardinale, a 10-year-old fifth-grader from Los Gatos who has been on-line for
- about a year, says she uses America Online for chats and games, but she has
- also done research for school reports. She notes that one difference between
- school friends and on-line friends is that'' on-line, you can, like, lie and
- they wouldn't really know.''
- A 19-year-old from the University of Arizona notes that on-line services
- have helped gay and lesbian teens who otherwise might feel isolated find
- support.
- LeeAnn C, the screen name for a 14-year-old Michigan girl, says
- communication with an endless variety of people is the greatest thing about
- going on-line.
- ''There is no way that if I was in a room with 23 people that I didn't know
- that I could possibly feel comfortable,'' she writes. ''This way, you can
- really feel comfortable just to talk to people about anything.''
- For example, some of the topics listed one recent afternoon in Teen Scene,
- home of teen bulletin boards for America Online, included: baseball, 11
- messages posted; drugs and booze, 27 messages; censorship, 30; teen
- vegetarians, 37; books, 33; poetry, 232; liberal teens, 21; conservative
- teens, 120; atheist teens, 142; Christian teens, 215; Satanists, 45; gay, bi
- and lesbian youth, 151; and on-line romance, 247.
- The positive aspects are so numerous that many people believe that fears
- about on-line dangers are exaggerated. Karen Coyle, of the Berkeley chapter of
- Computer Professionals for Social Responsibility, says commercial on-line
- officials and users monitor adult bulletin boards or chat areas to weed out
- youngsters.
- ''The dangers are in the local bulletin boards, the small ones listed in
- the computer freebie papers,'' says Coyle, who works in the library computer
- system at the University of California, Berkeley.
- Some of these boards, originally started by hobbyists, can be X-rated
- - including the likes of bestiality and kiddie porn - and are not monitored
- like commercial services.
- ''Sure, teen boys will figure out how to get into them, but those same boys
- will go to the drugstore and buy a dirty magazine,'' Coyle says. ''Kids are
- going to talk about sex anyway. Compusex - it can't get any safer, there are
- no fluids being exchanged!''
- Still, it is general knowledge that women of any age who are on-line are
- often targets of sexual comments ranging from mild come-ons to overt
- propositions. The majority of on-line users still are male; industry officials
- believe men outnumber women by about a 4-to-1 ratio. However, the anonymous
- nature of many services allows anyone to pretend to be of the opposite sex, a
- different race or any age or profession they choose, making it difficult to
- know whom you are dealing with.
- Industry officials say many sexual chat areas or message boards that may
- not be appropriate for children can be electronically blocked.
- ''It's not censorship,'' says Pam McGraw, a spokeswoman for America Online,
- addressing a fear of many on-line enthusiasts that - as with the recent debate
- over television violence - the government may try to meddle. ''It's an option
- for parents . . . to be able to restrict access by children.''
- Still, there are kids like Jason Hennessey, a 15-year-old Massachusetts
- sophomore who was on-line only two weeks when he set up access blocks on his
- own account - and then broke them.
- ''It's so easy to figure it out,'' says Jason, who says he taught himself
- everything he knows about computers because his parents are technophobes. ''It
- took me about five minutes.''
- Which is precisely why parents need to be knowledgeable about the on-line
- world.
- ''I don't think most parents have a clue about what's available on video
- games, computer games, on-line games and, eventually, interactive TV games,''
- says Johnny Wilson, 43, editor of Computer Gaming World. ''Parents should
- spend some time playing these games with their kids. Even if you just watch,
- you'll be aware of the potential positives and negatives.''
- Hilarie Gardner, 38, an employee of the Sausalito-based Whole Earth
- 'Lectronic Link (The WELL), who has led workshops on her own on computer
- safety and security, says that since parents can't shield children from
- everything, parents should strive to ''give tools, not make rules.''
- Gardner explains that when her children, ages 10 and 13, began going
- on-line two years ago, she talked to them about how to handle sticky
- situations.
- ''When my daughter was 12 and she got abusive comments from another kid,
- she told him to stop, locked him out and sent the (abusive) message to the
- systems operator,'' Gardner says. ''I was proud of her for doing that.''
- Marc Siegel of Mountain View, a consultant who helps teachers learn how to
- use the Internet, says parents' and teachers' fears about the potential for
- on-line debauchery can prevent them from seeing the value of the medium.
- ''The networks can be a great resource, tremendously useful in education,
- Siegel says. ''It has the ability to make learning part of the real world.''
- For example, he says, one program allowed students to tap into a project by
- NASA researchers in Antarctica. The students read the researchers' diaries
- on-line, asked them questions and got answers.
- ''Some middle-school girls got really interested in science,'' Siegel says.
- ''The (research) team leader was a woman.''
- At a recent exhibit on the data superhighway at the Exploratorium in San
- Francisco, students could tap into the University of Michigan to see moving
- weather maps, then link up with the Lawrence Berkeley lab to learn about Bucky
- Balls, the third known form of pure carbon.
- Howard Rheingold, editor of Whole Earth Review and author of ''The Virtual
- Community: Homesteading on the Electronic Frontier,'' credits the data
- superhighway with nothing less than the ability to strengthen our democracy
- - if the technology allows people to communicate actively with each other
- rather than just passively accept information generated by government or
- business.
- ''Games, home shopping, 500 channels - no, that's not all there is,''
- Rheingold says. ''Inherent in the technology is the possibility of one
- household uploading information to another household, not just receiving
- information from a media conglomerate. I think we should be the originators as
- well as the receivers of information.
- ''The question is,'' Rheingold continues, ''will we have 500 lanes coming
- in and a footpath going out? The whole idea of a democracy rests on
- individuals communicating with each other. Public discussion - that's what
- bulletin boards are all about.''
- Chester, of Campaign for Kids' TV, charges that the superhighway is being
- designed to ''meet the needs of the advertising community, not support a
- democracy.'' He warns that the 500 channels could translate into one long
- infomercial unless the government designates a percentage of channels as non-
- commercial stations aimed at parents, children, seniors and community
- groups.
- ''Your kid is watching 'Ren and Stimpy' on Nick and a notice flashes on the
- screen saying, 'Press this button and you'll be sent the dolls or the complete
- set of videos,' '' Chester says. ''Parents and schools will have to do a lot
- of work to prepare kids for this. We need to help kids understand these new
- things are being designed to sell. California has lagged behind in media
- literacy.''
- Chester and Rheingold urge parents and teachers to get involved now, while
- policy issues are being debated.
- ''Parents, the PTAs need to empower themselves to help redefine
- communication in the next century with our kids in mind,'' Chester says.
- ''Parent groups need to become activists on this issue.
- ''We live in a media environment,'' Chester says. ''We care so much about
- the rain forests and the oceans, but we care so little about the media
- environment.''
-
- SAN JOSE MERCURY NEWS
- Copyright 1994, San Jose Mercury News
-
- DATE: Sunday, March 20, 1994
- PAGE: 1H EDITION: Morning Final
- SECTION: Living LENGTH: 14 in. Medium
- SOURCE: Lori Eickmann
-
- TEACH YOUR CHILDREN THE RULES OF THE ROAD BEFORE THEY LOG ON
-
- HERE are some on-line safety and etiquette tips, courtesy of on-line
- service officials, a Prodigy brochure and several experienced users:
- Safety and security
- Set basic safety rules before children go on-line, and review the rules
- from time to time. Keep up with what your children do on-line and familiarize
- yourself with the areas they frequent so you'll know what they're likely to
- encounter.
- (box) Warn children to NEVER send personal information when chatting,
- sending e-mail, posting on a message board or doing a user profile. That
- includes phone numbers, addresses, passwords or information such as when
- parents get home from work or when the family is going on vacation.
- (box) Don't allow children to go on-line unsupervised if they're not old
- enough to go out to public places unsupervised.
- (box) When choosing a password, make it a combination of upper- and lower-
- case letters, or incorporate numbers to make the password more difficult to
- crack. Tell children to protect their password by not revealing it to anyone
- or letting anyone watch them log on. Change the password occasionally.
- (box) Find out if your on-line service has features that allow parents to
- block children's access to adult chat rooms and other such features.
- Social dangers, responsible behavior
- Talk to children ahead of time about unpleasant situations they may
- encounter, and brainstorm for ways they might handle such situations. Teach
- kids to lock out instant messages from people who are bothering them, and tell
- them to report inappropriate language or comments to you and to on-line
- service officials.
- The other side of the coin is that kids should be taught not to engage in
- inappropriate behavior on-line themselves. It is as unacceptable to curse at
- someone on-line or invade their private files as it is to scream epithets at
- someone in person or to break into their house. Treat the humans sitting at
- the other terminals with respect.
- (box) Inappropriate behavior includes harassment (unwelcome comments or
- language), flaming (emotional written attacks) and stalking (someone watching
- or following someone else). Also, writing in capital letters is the on-line
- equivalent of shouting and can be rude.
- (box) A possible danger is that children may feel they know someone they've
- become friends with on-line. Remind children that when people can create
- screen names and personalities and even faces, they may not be who they say
- they are.
- (box) Addiction -- spending unreasonable amounts of time and money on-line
- -- is a very real danger for some people. Many kids go through a phase of
- spending what seems like every waking moment on-line when it is new to them,
- but the interest usually drops to a more reasonable level after a while. Set
- time limits for being on-line from the start, for your children's sake and for
- the sake of your budget.